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Skeptic Friend

446 Posts

Posted - 01/25/2005 :  17:01:12  Show Profile  Visit Paulos23's Homepage Send Paulos23 a Private Message
New Virulent Strain of Sexually Transmitted Disease

The Centers for Disease Control have issued a warning about a new
virulent strain of sexually transmitted disease which is contracted through dangerous high risk behavior. The disease is called Gonorrhea Lecthym (Pronounced "Gonna Re-elect Him").

Many victims have contracted it after having been screwed by the
Bush-Cheney-Rove-Ashcroft administration for the past four years and
failing to take adequate measures to protect themselves.
Cognitive sequellae of individuals infected with Gonorrhea Lecthym
include antisocial personality disorder traits, delusions of grandeur with a messianic flavor, cognitive perseveration, inability to incorporate new information into a rigid idée fixe, xenophobia, inability to accept responsibility for actions, and a strong propensity for categorical, all-or-nothing thinking.

This epidemic is out of control. It has already resulted in brain
death in over 59,000,000 Americans. Excessive exposure to trailer parks, country gospel music and yellow ribbon asphyxiation are thought to be contributing factors.

New CDC Director Archbishop Burke has ordered a halt to research into the disease after determining that the disease is incurable and is merely God's will. Apparently, however, at least 55,000,000 of us have natural immunity and are poised to lead a brief but exciting life right after the rapture begins and our afflicted fellow Americans ascend to their eternal reward.

When you think about it, it really isn't very funny.

You can go wrong by being too skeptical as readily as by being too trusting. -- Robert A. Heinlein

Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored. -- Aldous Huxley

SFN Die Hard

14408 Posts

Posted - 01/25/2005 :  19:10:58   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send filthy a Private Message
Oh hell, that's the one we old-timers call the Bullhead Clap. It's very painful and makes taking a leak an adventure in sado/masochism.

Maybe that is indeed what's infecting Republicans today. If you can't happily drain the weasle, how can you be anything but pissed at those who can?

"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)

"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres

"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude

Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,

and Crypto-Communist!

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