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Subjectmatter
Skeptic Friend
173 Posts |
 Posted - 09/07/2005 : 10:27:45
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I doubt whether this idea is actually mine. Most likely I have ingested it while reading something obscure on the net, but nevertheless it deserves at least to be considered.
Consider a world where everyone is rendered barren at birth, having the process reversed only once they have completed a written test.
Not an advanced test, I am certainly not implying that only university graduates should have children, but a certain amount of sense should be expected of a paretn. Questions could be something like:
Your child asks you where babies come from. Do you:
a)Say that she is an evil child who will burn in hell and Jesus will weep at her ungodliness
b)Beat the child
c)Explain that your spouse will explain it.
d)Tell her about guns.
Your child is being potty trained. Do you:
a)Tell her that she is a naughty child and that is concentrated evil coming out of her backside(Family Guy)
b)Beat the child
c)Smile noncommitally and walk off.
d)Explain why shooting things is so much fun.
Your child is going through puberty. Do you:
a)Tell the child that her body is rotting because God had abandoned her. That the devil is responsible and had turned her into a toxic vessel for its purposes. That that's why Daddy left. Because her wretched body was swollen with evil.(Jerry Holkins aka. Tycho)
b)Beat the child
c)Ask how her day was in school.
d)Tell her that guns are good for society.
Just so that we get fewer neurotic, fanatic or dangerously violent children.
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Sibling Atom Bomb of Couteous Debate |
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Dude
SFN Die Hard
USA
6891 Posts |
Posted - 09/07/2005 : 10:53:26 [Permalink]
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What are you talking about?
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Ignorance is preferable to error; and he is less remote from the truth who believes nothing, than he who believes what is wrong.
-- Thomas Jefferson
"god :: the last refuge of a man with no answers and no argument." - G. Carlin
Hope, n.
The handmaiden of desperation; the opiate of despair; the illegible signpost on the road to perdition. ~~ da filth |
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Subjectmatter
Skeptic Friend
173 Posts |
Posted - 09/07/2005 : 12:34:36 [Permalink]
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| A written test which determines whether it is reasonable that you should have children. |
Sibling Atom Bomb of Couteous Debate |
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Dude
SFN Die Hard
USA
6891 Posts |
Posted - 09/07/2005 : 12:40:48 [Permalink]
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Who gets to write the test and decide what the right answers are?
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Ignorance is preferable to error; and he is less remote from the truth who believes nothing, than he who believes what is wrong.
-- Thomas Jefferson
"god :: the last refuge of a man with no answers and no argument." - G. Carlin
Hope, n.
The handmaiden of desperation; the opiate of despair; the illegible signpost on the road to perdition. ~~ da filth |
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filthy
SFN Die Hard
USA
14408 Posts |
Posted - 09/07/2005 : 12:49:05 [Permalink]
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quote:
Originally posted by Dude
Who gets to write the test and decide what the right answers are?
I'll do it (hand waving franticly in the air)! I'll do it; I'll do it! 
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"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)
"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres
"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude
Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,
and Crypto-Communist! 
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BigPapaSmurf
SFN Die Hard
3192 Posts |
Posted - 09/08/2005 : 05:36:27 [Permalink]
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| Can we screen out the fat chicks as well? |
"...things I have neither seen nor experienced nor heard tell of from anybody else; things, what is more, that do not in fact exist and could not ever exist at all. So my readers must not believe a word I say." -Lucian on his book True History
"...They accept such things on faith alone, without any evidence. So if a fraudulent and cunning person who knows how to take advantage of a situation comes among them, he can make himself rich in a short time." -Lucian critical of early Christians c.166 AD From his book, De Morte Peregrini |
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ocheewah
Skeptic Friend
USA
50 Posts |
Posted - 09/08/2005 : 08:00:43 [Permalink]
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Hey, some of us "fatties" (translate: well-padded in all the right places) make terrific parents. And what about all those people who are great test-takers but have no common sense or are totally self-absorbed. What makes them such good candidates for parenthood? And how do you delineate between fat, chunky, chubby, thick, etc? Where's the cut-off?
Early lesson in life - Why tap a six-pack when you can open a keg. |
Those who danced were thought quite insane by those who could not hear the music. |
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LizW
Skeptic Friend
USA
113 Posts |
Posted - 09/08/2005 : 19:37:51 [Permalink]
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quote:
Originally posted by Subjectmatter
Your child asks you where babies come from. Do you:
a)Say that she is an evil child who will burn in hell and Jesus will weep at her ungodliness
b)Beat the child
c)Explain that your spouse will explain it.
d)Tell her about guns.
Your child is being potty trained. Do you:
a)Tell her that she is a naughty child and that is concentrated evil coming out of her backside(Family Guy)
b)Beat the child
c)Smile noncommitally and walk off.
d)Explain why shooting things is so much fun.
Your child is going through puberty. Do you:
a)Tell the child that her body is rotting because God had abandoned her. That the devil is responsible and had turned her into a toxic vessel for its purposes. That that's why Daddy left. Because her wretched body was swollen with evil.(Jerry Holkins aka. Tycho)
b)Beat the child
c)Ask how her day was in school.
d)Tell her that guns are good for society.
None of these answers are acceptable. From now on all answers will be submitted in the form of an essay. Now take out your blue books, also there will be 3 extra credit points for the person who can use the word vomit and the word patience in the same sentence. |
You learn something new every g****mn day! |
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Dry_vby
Skeptic Friend
Australia
249 Posts |
Posted - 09/08/2005 : 21:13:08 [Permalink]
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You need a great deal of patience to raise children but every time I try being patient it makes me want to vomit.
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"I'll go along with the charade
Until I can think my way out.
I know it was all a big joke
Whatever it was about."
Bob Dylan
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astropin
SFN Regular
USA
970 Posts |
Posted - 09/08/2005 : 21:23:23 [Permalink]
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| This is a weird thread |
I would rather face a cold reality than delude myself with comforting fantasies.
You are free to believe what you want to believe and I am free to ridicule you for it.
Atheism:
The result of an unbiased and rational search for the truth.
Infinitus est numerus stultorum |
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marfknox
SFN Die Hard
USA
3739 Posts |
Posted - 09/08/2005 : 23:01:08 [Permalink]
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Should this have been posted in social issues or humor? Methinks the latter.
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"Too much certainty and clarity could lead to cruel intolerance" -Karen Armstrong
Check out my art store: http://www.marfknox.etsy.com
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Ricky
SFN Die Hard
USA
4907 Posts |
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Dry_vby
Skeptic Friend
Australia
249 Posts |
Posted - 09/09/2005 : 19:37:44 [Permalink]
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A needle pulling thread.
Me, a name I call myself. |
"I'll go along with the charade
Until I can think my way out.
I know it was all a big joke
Whatever it was about."
Bob Dylan
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Valiant Dancer
Forum Goalie
USA
4826 Posts |
Posted - 09/12/2005 : 09:07:00 [Permalink]
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quote:
Originally posted by Dry_vby
A needle pulling thread.
Me, a name I call myself.
Dough, means cash for all of us
Ray, a creepy guy I know
Me, a name I call my self
Farr, A guy from MASH
So, insipid is the plot
It will bring us back much Dough!
(Slightly changed from a MAD magazine "Sound of Music" parody.) |
Cthulhu/Asmodeus when you're tired of voting for the lesser of two evils
Brother Cutlass of Reasoned Discussion |
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Stargirl
Skeptic Friend
USA
94 Posts |
Posted - 10/04/2005 : 21:16:18 [Permalink]
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I know this thread didn't go very far but I just heard about this on the Mike Malloy show on Air America radio and thought it might give focus to this discussion.
According to this story Indiana is considering a bill to require a certificate for medically assisted pregnancies.
quote:
Among the determining factors is a requirement that the women be married to a person of the opposite sex. The assessment would contain a description of the family lifestyle and automatically exclude lesbians. Women would also have to provide proof that they have participated in faith-based or church activities.
So should the government be allowed to dictate who can have children by artificial means?
Considering the requirement of proof of faith-based activities does this mean that atheists wont be allowed to have children by artificial means?
And who would determine whether or not a couple has the right family lifestyle?
And here the right-wing nuts thought it would be the liberals who would intrude and limit their reproductive rights.
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If God did not exist, it would be necessary to invent him - Voltaire |
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beskeptigal
SFN Die Hard
USA
3834 Posts |
Posted - 10/05/2005 : 00:45:32 [Permalink]
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| We don't need a parent test. We need a few required parenting skills classes in high schools. |
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