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R.Wreck
SFN Regular

USA
1191 Posts

Posted - 12/02/2006 :  09:50:49  Show Profile Send R.Wreck a Private Message
In the Free For All - Science & Religion thread, Bill scott said:

quote:
Yet you, in all your glory, can not even produce one sting (sic) of DNA from nothing. (sigh)



I think this would be an excellent addition to The TGE Project which contains hundreds of arguments for the existence of a diety, from the sublime to the truly absurdly Hovindly ridiculous, such as:

quote:

106. ARGUMENT FROM AGNOSTICISM

1) I don't know.
2) Neither do you.
3) Therefore, God exists.



and

quote:

111. ARGUMENT FROM MARTYRDOM

1) The apostles would not have died for something they knew wasn't true.
2) The atheist gives examples of martyrs outside Christendom, but they were obviously fooled by Satan.
3) Therefore, God exists.



and

quote:

305. ARGUMENT FROM GEORGE HARRISON

1) George Harrison wrote "My Sweet Lord."
2) It's one of the most beautiful pop songs ever, and one of the only pop songs devoted to God.
3) I don't care if it is plagiarized from "He's So Fine!"
4) And no, the backup singers are NOT singing "Hare Krishna!"
5) Therefore, God exists.



You get the idea (well maybe Bill doesn't, but I trust that the rest of you do).

Anyway, if it's not already on the list, and no, I haven't read the whole thing, I propose:

BILL'S ARGUMENT FROM MAN'S INABILITY TO CREATE DNA:

1) DNA exists.
2) Man has not been able to create DNA.
3) Therefore, God exists.

Anyone have any more? Bill?

The foundation of morality is to . . . give up pretending to believe that for which there is no evidence, and repeating unintelligible propositions about things beyond the possibliities of knowledge.
T. H. Huxley

The Cattle Prod of Enlightened Compassion

BigPapaSmurf
SFN Die Hard

3192 Posts

Posted - 12/02/2006 :  09:59:03   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send BigPapaSmurf a Private Message
1) We dont know where the matter in the universe came from prior to the big bang.
2) Therefor, God exists.

"...things I have neither seen nor experienced nor heard tell of from anybody else; things, what is more, that do not in fact exist and could not ever exist at all. So my readers must not believe a word I say." -Lucian on his book True History

"...They accept such things on faith alone, without any evidence. So if a fraudulent and cunning person who knows how to take advantage of a situation comes among them, he can make himself rich in a short time." -Lucian critical of early Christians c.166 AD From his book, De Morte Peregrini
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Gorgo
SFN Die Hard

USA
5310 Posts

Posted - 12/02/2006 :  10:18:26   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send Gorgo a Private Message
You forgot about Norman Greenbaum's "Spirit in the Sky."

Abba exists, therefore God exists.

I know the rent is in arrears
The dog has not been fed in years
It's even worse than it appears
But it's alright-
Jerry Garcia
Robert Hunter



Edited by - Gorgo on 12/02/2006 10:19:00
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GeeMack
SFN Regular

USA
1093 Posts

Posted - 12/02/2006 :  16:56:24   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send GeeMack a Private Message
And George Harrison has no monopoly on proving God exists...
1) Jesus Is Just Alright with The Byrds.
2) Jesus Is Just Alright with The Doobie Brothers.
3) Therefore, God exists.
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HalfMooner
Dingaling

Philippines
15831 Posts

Posted - 12/02/2006 :  17:47:22   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send HalfMooner a Private Message
1. Critical thinking and science make my brain hurt.
2. Therefore, God exists.


Biology is just physics that has begun to smell bad.” —HalfMooner
Here's a link to Moonscape News, and one to its Archive.
Edited by - HalfMooner on 12/02/2006 20:14:15
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pleco
SFN Addict

USA
2996 Posts

Posted - 12/02/2006 :  17:53:50   [Permalink]  Show Profile  Visit pleco's Homepage Send pleco a Private Message
This one is dedicated to Bill from that site:

quote:
404. ARGUMENT FROM COMPLEXITY

1) That which is complex has a creator.
2) The universe is complex.
3) Only God is complex enough to create the universe.
4) Therefore, God exists.



And one more on this theme:

quote:
490. ARGUMENT FROM GEORGE MICHAEL

1) George Michael says you got to have a' faith, a' faith, a' faith.
2) I have faith.
3) Therefore, God exists.


491. ARGUMENT FROM COMPLEXITY

1) The human body is too complex to have happened by chance.
2) So it must have been designed.
3) [atheist: Well, wouldn't God be even more complex? So does he have a designer?]
4) See argument 490.
5) Therefore, God exists.


by Filthy
The neo-con methane machine will soon be running at full fart.
Edited by - pleco on 12/02/2006 18:05:30
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filthy
SFN Die Hard

USA
14408 Posts

Posted - 12/03/2006 :  01:12:41   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send filthy a Private Message
ARGUMENT FROM VERMIFORMS

(1) A lady found a worm in her burger.
(2) She became ill but did not die.
(3) Her husband did not die.
(4) The McDonald's manager did not die.
(5) The worm died.
(6) Therefore God exists.




"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)

"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres


"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude

Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,

and Crypto-Communist!

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filthy
SFN Die Hard

USA
14408 Posts

Posted - 12/03/2006 :  07:57:44   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send filthy a Private Message
This is kind'a fun.....

ARGUMENT FROM A LACK OF TRAFFIC CONES

(1) There is a Great, Gaping Hole in the pavement.
(2) Some dimwit has stolen the warning trafffic cones from around the Great, Gaping Hole.
(3) I drove by the Great, Gaping Hole at 2 AM, stone drunk.
(4) I did not fall into the Great, Gaping Hole.
(5) Therefore, God exists.




"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)

"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres


"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude

Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,

and Crypto-Communist!

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Gorgo
SFN Die Hard

USA
5310 Posts

Posted - 12/03/2006 :  09:30:06   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send Gorgo a Private Message
Or I did fall into the hole, therefore god exists.

I know the rent is in arrears
The dog has not been fed in years
It's even worse than it appears
But it's alright-
Jerry Garcia
Robert Hunter



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Neurosis
SFN Regular

USA
675 Posts

Posted - 12/03/2006 :  15:43:39   [Permalink]  Show Profile  Send Neurosis an AOL message Send Neurosis a Private Message
Or I fell into the hole and did not die like the other fifty people did, therefore God exist.

Facts! Pssh, you can prove anything even remotely true with facts.
- Homer Simpson

[God] is an infinite nothing from nowhere with less power over our universe than the secretary of agriculture.
- Prof. Frink

Lisa: Yes, but wouldn't you rather know the truth than to delude yourself for happiness?
Marge: Well... um.... [goes outside to jump on tampoline with Homer.]
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Neurosis
SFN Regular

USA
675 Posts

Posted - 12/03/2006 :  15:47:41   [Permalink]  Show Profile  Send Neurosis an AOL message Send Neurosis a Private Message
Bill:

1) I just don't believe that science or man can ever answer these questions.
2) [Questions are answered with scientific data]
3) Yea but I can't understand how that answers the questions
4) [Patient skeptics try to reword]
5) [Though evidence was given] I still don't get how [Insert already discussed question] without god.
6) Therefore god exist.

Facts! Pssh, you can prove anything even remotely true with facts.
- Homer Simpson

[God] is an infinite nothing from nowhere with less power over our universe than the secretary of agriculture.
- Prof. Frink

Lisa: Yes, but wouldn't you rather know the truth than to delude yourself for happiness?
Marge: Well... um.... [goes outside to jump on tampoline with Homer.]
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Randy
SFN Regular

USA
1989 Posts

Posted - 12/03/2006 :  17:06:27   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send Randy a Private Message
1) I won the lottery
2) god answers prayers
3) Therefore, god exists

"We are all connected; to each other biologically, to the earth chemically, to the rest of the universe atomically."

"So you're made of detritus [from exploded stars]. Get over it. Or better yet, celebrate it. After all, what nobler thought can one cherish than that the universe lives within us all?"
-Neil DeGrasse Tyson
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Gorgo
SFN Die Hard

USA
5310 Posts

Posted - 12/03/2006 :  17:23:16   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send Gorgo a Private Message
quote:
Originally posted by Neurosis

Or I fell into the hole and did not die like the other fifty people did, therefore God exist.



Or I did die, like 3,000 other people did, therefore god exists.

I know the rent is in arrears
The dog has not been fed in years
It's even worse than it appears
But it's alright-
Jerry Garcia
Robert Hunter



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filthy
SFN Die Hard

USA
14408 Posts

Posted - 12/03/2006 :  18:52:09   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send filthy a Private Message
ARGUMENT FROM EBAY

(1) A toasted sandwich,
(2) Sold for big bucks on Ebay.
(3) Therefore God exists.




"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)

"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres


"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude

Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,

and Crypto-Communist!

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Neurosis
SFN Regular

USA
675 Posts

Posted - 12/03/2006 :  19:25:32   [Permalink]  Show Profile  Send Neurosis an AOL message Send Neurosis a Private Message
quote:
Originally posted by Gorgo

quote:
Originally posted by Neurosis

Or I fell into the hole and did not die like the other fifty people did, therefore God exist.



Or I did die, like 3,000 other people did, therefore god exists.



I think that ends the argument Gorgo. Answers the question by going straight to the horses mouth.

Facts! Pssh, you can prove anything even remotely true with facts.
- Homer Simpson

[God] is an infinite nothing from nowhere with less power over our universe than the secretary of agriculture.
- Prof. Frink

Lisa: Yes, but wouldn't you rather know the truth than to delude yourself for happiness?
Marge: Well... um.... [goes outside to jump on tampoline with Homer.]
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Ricky
SFN Die Hard

USA
4907 Posts

Posted - 12/04/2006 :  00:02:54   [Permalink]  Show Profile  Send Ricky an AOL message Send Ricky a Private Message
I don't remember where I read this:

Argument from Intimidation:

1. See this noose?
2. Therefore God exists.

Why continue? Because we must. Because we have the call. Because it is nobler to fight for rationality without winning than to give up in the face of continued defeats. Because whatever true progress humanity makes is through the rationality of the occasional individual and because any one individual we may win for the cause may do more for humanity than a hundred thousand who hug their superstitions to their breast.
- Isaac Asimov
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