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 Discovery Institute drill misses Hell
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HalfMooner
Dingaling

Philippines
15831 Posts

Posted - 12/06/2006 :  23:20:42  Show Profile Send HalfMooner a Private Message
A dry hole for DI

North Oxford, Massachusetts, December 6, 2006 (BS) -- "Imagine there's no heaven / It's easy if you try / No hell below us / Above us only sky..." Thus sang Beatle John Lennon over thirty-five years ago. It now appears that we no longer need to "imagine," at least concerning Hell.

"Shut 'er down boys," sang crew foreman Gregory Bernsson last night. With those words, a five-year-old geotheological drilling operation was unceremoniously abandoned by the Center for Science and Culture, a research arm of Seattle's Discovery Institute. Begun in 2001, the Hell-Bore project intended to seek proof of the existence of the Christian Hell, by drilling a one-meter-wide hole into it. The drilling was halted when no further resistance was encountered, and it was calculated that the drill bit had come out on the other side of the earth.


DI's Hell-Bore drilling rig

"We chose the state of Massachusetts to site our exploratory drilling because we felt that state was likely to be closest to Hell," explained the Discovery Institute's president, Bruce Chapman. "Logically, how far from Satan's abode could a state that allows abortions and same-sex marriages be? But it turns out that we've disproven Hell, rather than proving its existence. At least everyone now knows that we do real science."


Hell-Bore's drill bit hits an air pocket


The Discovery Institute expects to recover some of their operating expenses by selling the bore. Wal-Mart today announced that it will build warehouses at each end of the bore, and construct a high-speed freight conveyor system through it.


Biology is just physics that has begun to smell bad.” —HalfMooner
Here's a link to Moonscape News, and one to its Archive.

Edited by - HalfMooner on 12/06/2006 23:23:53

JohnOAS
SFN Regular

Australia
800 Posts

Posted - 12/07/2006 :  00:08:53   [Permalink]  Show Profile  Visit JohnOAS's Homepage Send JohnOAS a Private Message
While everyone knows that you end up in China whenever you drill through the earth from anywhere, the actual opposing point for North Oxford, Massachusetts, is actually somewhere south of Africa. (I think, but it's late in the day, and my math/geography skills may be waning). Of course the picture wouldn't have been half as interesting.




John's just this guy, you know.
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Starman
SFN Regular

Sweden
1613 Posts

Posted - 12/07/2006 :  00:29:56   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send Starman a Private Message
Who says you have to drill straight down?

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HalfMooner
Dingaling

Philippines
15831 Posts

Posted - 12/07/2006 :  00:45:15   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send HalfMooner a Private Message
Well, you'll notice that the bit came out at an angle. For those of you who have not been paying attention, there has been some wonderful progress made in the field of directional drilling.


Biology is just physics that has begun to smell bad.” —HalfMooner
Here's a link to Moonscape News, and one to its Archive.
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filthy
SFN Die Hard

USA
14408 Posts

Posted - 12/07/2006 :  04:44:46   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send filthy a Private Message
Heh, one of my long-time favorites!

And it's genesis is remarkable......
quote:
Well to hell hoax

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

The "Well to hell" hoax is a popular urban legend that has been circulating on the internet for over ten years. Its provenance is older than that, however, with the tale first appearing in English through a 1989 dispatch created by the Trinity Broadcasting Network. This source had picked up the story from Finnish newspaper reports that claimed scientists drilling at the Kola Peninsula, USSR, had broken through to hell.

The scientists actually did drill and lots of good science came from the project. But the Well to Hell spoof was, probably, it's most lasting impact on the public.

Thanks for the chuckle, 'mooner.

Edited to add Snopes take on it.




"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)

"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres


"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude

Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,

and Crypto-Communist!

Edited by - filthy on 12/07/2006 05:01:02
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HalfMooner
Dingaling

Philippines
15831 Posts

Posted - 12/07/2006 :  05:08:04   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send HalfMooner a Private Message
Ah, Jeeze, Fil! I'd never heard of the Hole to Hell. Here I thought I was dreaming it up all fresh myself. At least I didn't place the well on the Kola Peninsula, or have a microphone involved. But otherwise, my story is identical.


Biology is just physics that has begun to smell bad.” —HalfMooner
Here's a link to Moonscape News, and one to its Archive.
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filthy
SFN Die Hard

USA
14408 Posts

Posted - 12/07/2006 :  05:20:52   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send filthy a Private Message
quote:
Originally posted by HalfMooner

Ah, Jeeze, Fil! I'd never heard of the Hole to Hell. Here I thought I was dreaming it up all fresh myself. At least I didn't place the well on the Kola Peninsula, or have a microphone involved. But otherwise, my story is identical.



I hadn't thought about it for years and appreciate the reminder.

It truly is one of the world's better spoofs as proven by it's tenacity. I'm sure that it will be around a lot longer than we will.






"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)

"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres


"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude

Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,

and Crypto-Communist!

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Original_Intent
SFN Regular

USA
609 Posts

Posted - 12/07/2006 :  15:30:58   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send Original_Intent a Private Message
quote:
Originally posted by filthy

quote:
Originally posted by HalfMooner

Ah, Jeeze, Fil! I'd never heard of the Hole to Hell. Here I thought I was dreaming it up all fresh myself. At least I didn't place the well on the Kola Peninsula, or have a microphone involved. But otherwise, my story is identical.



I hadn't thought about it for years and appreciate the reminder.

It truly is one of the world's better spoofs as proven by it's tenacity. I'm sure that it will be around a lot longer than we will.









Anyone should know you can't drill strait down anywhere in the US and hit DC.....

Maybe it's thier tools...... I reccomend this Handy Dandy tool..

Peace
Joe
Edited by - Original_Intent on 12/07/2006 15:31:25
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Dave W.
Info Junkie

USA
26001 Posts

Posted - 12/07/2006 :  15:53:23   [Permalink]  Show Profile  Visit Dave W.'s Homepage Send Dave W. a Private Message
quote:
Originally posted by JohnOAS

While everyone knows that you end up in China whenever you drill through the earth from anywhere, the actual opposing point for North Oxford, Massachusetts, is actually somewhere south of Africa. (I think, but it's late in the day, and my math/geography skills may be waning).
I get about 42°S, 109°E - somewhere around 800 miles SW of Perth, Australia, in the south Indian Ocean.

- Dave W. (Private Msg, EMail)
Evidently, I rock!
Why not question something for a change?
Visit Dave's Psoriasis Info, too.
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JohnOAS
SFN Regular

Australia
800 Posts

Posted - 12/07/2006 :  17:06:24   [Permalink]  Show Profile  Visit JohnOAS's Homepage Send JohnOAS a Private Message
quote:
Originally posted by Dave W.
I get about 42°S, 109°E - somewhere around 800 miles SW of Perth, Australia, in the south Indian Ocean.



You are quite correct. Reverse engineering my stupidity is somewhat more difficult than making the original mistake was, but here's what I think happened:

I took Massachussets 72 degrees West longitude (-71.89 parameter from Google Maps), and got my 18.28 by subtracting from 90 instead of 180.
Then, in the spririt of consistency in stupidity, instead of just flipping the latitude from 42 degrees N to 42 degrees S (Seeing as parallels are, well, parallel), I did the same trick to go from 42 to -48.

A great day for science!


Also, According to the tool posted by Original_Intent. You can actually dig through to China (Beijing, specifically), provided you start at the appropriate spot in Argentina. Of course I no longer expect anyone to take my word for it...

John's just this guy, you know.
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