Day 15

I’m starting to regret becoming a parent. These kids just sit there like bumps on a log. Maybe I’m doing something wrong? No one’s molding, no one’s turning colors, no one smells. I try to really play favorites, too. “Thank You!” is getting kisses now and gentle caresses, and “You’re An Idiot” is screamed at like Ricky screams at Lucy after she buys a hat. And yet, nothing. Baby Bachmann is getting a workout, too. Today, she heard her namesake’s retelling of her success at the 2012 Republican presidential debates: "I was very proud of the fact that I didn't get anything wrong that I said during the course of the debates." She who shall not be named (the unlabeled rice jar) is being outright ignored like the mistake she is.