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Jelly Fish
New Member

46 Posts

Posted - 02/27/2003 :  03:39:26  Show Profile  Send Jelly Fish an AOL message Send Jelly Fish a Private Message
Iraq have shaved off their pubic hair in protest against America.

Their placards say, 'Read our lips, no Bush!'

Jelly Fish
New Member

46 Posts

Posted - 02/27/2003 :  03:42:28   [Permalink]  Show Profile  Send Jelly Fish an AOL message Send Jelly Fish a Private Message
Not so much about the war, but more about the U.S. attitude to everyone else...lol


This is the transcript of the ACTUAL radio conversation of a US Naval ship
and the Canadians, off the coast of Newfoundland, Oct 95. Radio conversation
released by the Chief of Naval Operations.

CANADIANS: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the south, to
avoid a collision.

AMERICANS: Recommend you divert your course 15 degrees to the North,
to avoid a collision.

CANADIANS: Negative. You will have to divert your course 15 degrees
to the south to avoid a collision.

AMERICANS: This is the Captian of a US Navy ship. I say again ,
divert YOUR course.

CANADIANS: Negative. I say again, you will have to divert your course.

AMERICANS: THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER US LINCOLN. THE SECOND
LARGEST SHIP IN THE UNITED STATES ATLANTIC FLEET. WE ARE
ACCOMPANIED BY THREE DESTROYERS, THREE CRUISERS AND NUMEROUS
SUPPORT VESSELS.DEMAND THAT YOU CHANGE YOUR COURSE
15 DEGREES NORTH, SAY AGAIN, THAT'S 15 DEGREES NORTH, OR
COUNTERMEASURES WILL BE UNDERTAKEN TO ENSURE THE SAFETY OF
THIS SHIP!
....
.....
.....
.....
.....
......
.....
.....
......
.....
.....
CANADIANS:
We are a lighthouse. Your call.


Glendower..“I can call spirits from the vasty deep.”
Hotspur..“Why, so can I, or so can any man; But will they come when you do call for them?”
Jelly.."Not a hope in hell"
adapted from Henry 1V part 1 by Mr W. Shakespeare
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Avenel
Skeptic Friend

USA
60 Posts

Posted - 02/27/2003 :  08:25:37   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send Avenel a Private Message
quote:
Originally posted by Jelly Fish


This is the transcript of the ACTUAL radio conversation of a US Naval ship
and the Canadians, off the coast of Newfoundland, Oct 95. Radio conversation
released by the Chief of Naval Operations.



No, it's not. It's an urban legend, it never happened. See this page at the Urban Legends Reference Pages. As a U.S. Navy veteran that spent some small amount of time on a bridge, that simply isn't what Navy radio communications sound like.

"How many angels can swim on the head of a beer?" - Roger Ramjet
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Gorgo
SFN Die Hard

USA
5310 Posts

Posted - 02/27/2003 :  08:32:55   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send Gorgo a Private Message
Did I read this one here? -

Guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. Takes a look around and asks the bartender, "Hey isn't that Bush, Cheney and Rumsfeld over in the Corner?"

"Yup."

Guy walks over to the table.

"Hey guys, what's up with this whole Iraq thing?"

Cheney says, "Oh, 'W' here wants to kill 40,000 Iraqis and a blonde with big boobs."

Guy says, "Why does he want to kill a blonde with big boobs?"

Cheney pokes Rumsfeld with his elbow, "See I told you no one would give a shit about 40,00 Iraqis!"

I know the rent is in arrears
The dog has not been fed in years
It's even worse than it appears
But it's alright-
Jerry Garcia
Robert Hunter



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Jelly Fish
New Member

46 Posts

Posted - 02/27/2003 :  10:14:41   [Permalink]  Show Profile  Send Jelly Fish an AOL message Send Jelly Fish a Private Message
lol Gorgo...

Hey Avenel, this topic is called jokes...gettit?.....and I believe that even if it didnt happen exactly, I'm sure that the attitude displayed in the "lighthouse legend" happens all the time..

Even if its an urban legend then its still funny, and its funnier still to non americans hehe..

Jelly fish xx
If its funny once, its funny everytime..

Glendower..“I can call spirits from the vasty deep.”
Hotspur..“Why, so can I, or so can any man; But will they come when you do call for them?”
Jelly.."Not a hope in hell"
adapted from Henry 1V part 1 by Mr W. Shakespeare
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Avenel
Skeptic Friend

USA
60 Posts

Posted - 02/27/2003 :  11:02:04   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send Avenel a Private Message
quote:
Originally posted by Jelly Fish

lol Gorgo...

Hey Avenel, this topic is called jokes...gettit?.....and I believe that even if it didnt happen exactly, I'm sure that the attitude displayed in the "lighthouse legend" happens all the time..




But, you didn't say 'Here's a joke', you said 'This is the transcript of the ACTUAL radio conversation ...'. While the subject may be jokes, this is a skeptical forum, and as skeptics, we should refrain from labeling anything as 'true' that is not in fact true. It's not even a question if it happened 'exactly', there is no evidence it happened AT ALL.

Have I seen bull headed arrogance from commanders of naval vessels, you bet. Americans, Japanese, Canadians, Kiwis, Aussies; every navy in the Pacific I had experience with had them. Sturgeon's Law applies universally.

"How many angels can swim on the head of a beer?" - Roger Ramjet
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Jelly Fish
New Member

46 Posts

Posted - 02/27/2003 :  11:39:44   [Permalink]  Show Profile  Send Jelly Fish an AOL message Send Jelly Fish a Private Message
Good point Avenel...I did say ACTUAL (I cut and pasted the joke) and you were right to point out what you did.

I'm enjoying this forum, and I'm sure being bull headed isnt just a requirement of US naval commanders.

Out of interest, and I dont know your age, but you said you were a veteran and I wondered whether reservists in the US have been called up/warned they might be called up?

I believe in the UK they have been advised, and its in the media somewhere that an 80 year old recd a call (by accident , we have to hope!! lol)

Jelly

Glendower..“I can call spirits from the vasty deep.”
Hotspur..“Why, so can I, or so can any man; But will they come when you do call for them?”
Jelly.."Not a hope in hell"
adapted from Henry 1V part 1 by Mr W. Shakespeare
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Computer Org
Skeptic Friend

392 Posts

Posted - 02/27/2003 :  11:54:35   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send Computer Org a Private Message
quote:
Originally posted by Avenel

quote:
Originally posted by Jelly Fish


This is the transcript of the ACTUAL radio conversation of a US Naval ship
and the Canadians, off the coast of Newfoundland, Oct 95. Radio conversation
released by the Chief of Naval Operations.


No, it's not. It's an urban legend, it never happened. See this page at the Urban Legends Reference Pages. As a U.S. Navy veteran that spent some small amount of time on a bridge, that simply isn't what Navy radio communications sound like.

Never mind the 'hot air', Avenel. If in 1995 we (--or any modern navy--) are incapable of discerning a lighthouse from another ship, we are ALL in DEEP HORSE HOCKEY!!!

Do thou amend thy face, and I'll amend my life. --Falstaff
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Avenel
Skeptic Friend

USA
60 Posts

Posted - 02/27/2003 :  12:02:05   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send Avenel a Private Message
quote:
Originally posted by Jelly Fish
Out of interest, and I dont know your age, but you said you were a veteran and I wondered whether reservists in the US have been called up/warned they might be called up?



Various active reservists have been called up steadily for months. I doubt inactive reservists are in much danger of call up, but it's possible. My inactive reserve time ended in '89. While still theoretically possible to be called back to duty, there's a whole lot of people in their twenties and thirties that'll get called before I will. Short of WWIII and the US being invaded, it's not likely.

"How many angels can swim on the head of a beer?" - Roger Ramjet
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Jelly Fish
New Member

46 Posts

Posted - 02/27/2003 :  12:03:55   [Permalink]  Show Profile  Send Jelly Fish an AOL message Send Jelly Fish a Private Message
rofl org......lol

Well, everyone is in deep horse hockey (lol) except Saddam and Iraq, of course, who dont have a Navy.

To the boats, to the boats!!

Jelly Fish
(not to be confused with a lighthouse)

Glendower..“I can call spirits from the vasty deep.”
Hotspur..“Why, so can I, or so can any man; But will they come when you do call for them?”
Jelly.."Not a hope in hell"
adapted from Henry 1V part 1 by Mr W. Shakespeare
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Jelly Fish
New Member

46 Posts

Posted - 02/27/2003 :  12:09:20   [Permalink]  Show Profile  Send Jelly Fish an AOL message Send Jelly Fish a Private Message
So Avenel, how do you feel about that?
Imagine if you were called up?...and now your beliefs were different....you were a pacifist...could you refuse?

Its interesting you feel you wont be needed. You suspect a short sharp war with Iraq. I suspect we all hope that is to be the case if the inevitable happens....cos it will....Bush needs someone to punish....and Bin Laden is still a free man but elusive...so Saddam is going to get it!

Jelly

Glendower..“I can call spirits from the vasty deep.”
Hotspur..“Why, so can I, or so can any man; But will they come when you do call for them?”
Jelly.."Not a hope in hell"
adapted from Henry 1V part 1 by Mr W. Shakespeare
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Avenel
Skeptic Friend

USA
60 Posts

Posted - 02/27/2003 :  12:51:12   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send Avenel a Private Message
quote:
Originally posted by Jelly Fish

So Avenel, how do you feel about that?
Imagine if you were called up?...and now your beliefs were different....you were a pacifist...could you refuse?



If I were pacifist enough to claim 'Conciencious (sp?) Objector' status, yes. Otherwise, since I'm a strong believer in Civil Disobedience, I'd take my jail time stoically.

quote:

Its interesting you feel you wont be needed. You suspect a short sharp war with Iraq. I suspect we all hope that is to be the case if the inevitable happens....cos it will....Bush needs someone to punish....and Bin Laden is still a free man but elusive...so Saddam is going to get it!



I feel I won't be needed because the Navy doesn't really want me. I'm a 40 year old with a bum shoulder who hasn't fixed a radar in 16 years. The only Naval reservists I can see being called up are SeaBees and Beachmasters.

"How many angels can swim on the head of a beer?" - Roger Ramjet
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Jelly Fish
New Member

46 Posts

Posted - 02/27/2003 :  12:55:28   [Permalink]  Show Profile  Send Jelly Fish an AOL message Send Jelly Fish a Private Message
Hi Avenel...

Good for you. Nothing like someone prepared to go to jail. Like M.Ali....but I wont quote him again...

Sorry about your shoulder, mate.

Jelly
stinging like a j.

Glendower..“I can call spirits from the vasty deep.”
Hotspur..“Why, so can I, or so can any man; But will they come when you do call for them?”
Jelly.."Not a hope in hell"
adapted from Henry 1V part 1 by Mr W. Shakespeare
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walt fristoe
SFN Regular

USA
505 Posts

Posted - 03/15/2003 :  17:59:30   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send walt fristoe a Private Message


If Turkey attacks Iraq from behind, will they need Greece?


"If God chose George Bus of all the people in the world, how good could God be?"
Bill Maher
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filthy
SFN Die Hard

USA
14408 Posts

Posted - 03/15/2003 :  19:19:49   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send filthy a Private Message
quote:


If Turkey attacks Iraq from behind, will they need Greece?




Hahahaha! Good one!

The light house joke is very old, probably dating back, in one form or another, to the days when ships first had radio communications. I first heard it as a Seaman Apprentice in 1957. But, I still get a chuckle out of it, even today.


"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)

"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres


"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude

Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,

and Crypto-Communist!

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Valiant Dancer
Forum Goalie

USA
4826 Posts

Posted - 03/17/2003 :  10:13:42   [Permalink]  Show Profile  Visit Valiant Dancer's Homepage Send Valiant Dancer a Private Message
quote:
Originally posted by Avenel

quote:
Originally posted by Jelly Fish


This is the transcript of the ACTUAL radio conversation of a US Naval ship
and the Canadians, off the coast of Newfoundland, Oct 95. Radio conversation
released by the Chief of Naval Operations.



No, it's not. It's an urban legend, it never happened. See this page at the Urban Legends Reference Pages. As a U.S. Navy veteran that spent some small amount of time on a bridge, that simply isn't what Navy radio communications sound like.



This is a story that floated among the Tin Can Navy at the end of the Vietnam War:

The USS Turner Joy, a destroyer with three 5"-38's spotted a target off the coast of North Vietnam.
Assuming it friendly, a radio call was put out:
"This is the USS Turner Joy, Please identify yourself."
No response.
Signal lights were used:
"This is the USS Turner Joy, identify yourself, friend or foe."
No response.
Signal lights again:
"This is the USS Turner Joy, identify yourself or we will commence firing"

Answer:

"This is the Battleship USS New Jersey, You may fire when ready!"


J. Edward Snyder Jr. (skipper of the New Jersey) confirms the story but says the other small vessel was unidentified and in command of a Leiutenant.

http://www.usspennsylvania.com/NewJersyReply.htm


Cthulhu/Asmodeus when you're tired of voting for the lesser of two evils

Brother Cutlass of Reasoned Discussion
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