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 Again, the Landover Baptist mailbag......
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filthy
SFN Die Hard

USA
14408 Posts

Posted - 11/12/2004 :  19:20:01  Show Profile Send filthy a Private Message
Communications from the clueless to the ridiculous. Ya gotta love it!

quote:
i was recently on your website, off of the white house website. well i just need to say FUCK YOU! YOU GUYS ARE SICK AND WILL ROT IN HELL!! guess what? im a woman, i wear mens clothes sometimes, i even show cleavage sometimes, oh no!! i swear, i go to school, my family is catholic and episcipals. what you gonna do about it? hmmm? beating children will land you in jail!!!!!!! i can contact the police right fucking now and have you all imprisoned. if your son doesnt like sports, he doesnt fucking have to!!! dont break his fucking arm because he doesnt like fucking sports! acting all sweet to your child then beating them? that is sadistic. you arent catholic, you are fucking sadists! i hope you all rot in the depths of hell. people like you disgust me! i hate you all! you need to stop this nonsense or i will have you all taken to jail where you deserve to be FOREVER! EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU MAKE ME SICK! BEATING A CHILD IS WRONG!!! OUR NATION IS FULL OF DIVERSITY! including gay people, if that is how your kid will be, then that's how it is and you should love them! do not break their bones to punish them! that is called CHILD ABUSE and guess what? ITS NOT JUST A SIN... ITS A FELONY! ROT IN HELL FUCKERS!!!!

http://www.landoverbaptist.org/mail/1004.html

This time, mixed in with the usual panic & recriminatios & threats of legal prosecution, there are a couple of letters that show that some folks are not entirely beyond hope.

Enjoy!


"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)

"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres


"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude

Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,

and Crypto-Communist!

H. Humbert
SFN Die Hard

USA
4574 Posts

Posted - 11/12/2004 :  19:25:41   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send H. Humbert a Private Message
I love that site. I don't understand how anyone couldn't figure out that it was a spoof after reading more than 1 or 2 articles.

Good stuff. :)

"A man is his own easiest dupe, for what he wishes to be true he generally believes to be true." --Demosthenes

"The first principle is that you must not fool yourself - and you are the easiest person to fool." --Richard P. Feynman

"Face facts with dignity." --found inside a fortune cookie
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Dude
SFN Die Hard

USA
6891 Posts

Posted - 11/12/2004 :  20:03:50   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send Dude a Private Message
Yeah, H.H. How can anyone look at that site and not realize it's a parody?

But yeah, I like Landover. Goof for a laugh all the time.

Ignorance is preferable to error; and he is less remote from the truth who believes nothing, than he who believes what is wrong.
-- Thomas Jefferson

"god :: the last refuge of a man with no answers and no argument." - G. Carlin

Hope, n.
The handmaiden of desperation; the opiate of despair; the illegible signpost on the road to perdition. ~~ da filth
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H. Humbert
SFN Die Hard

USA
4574 Posts

Posted - 11/12/2004 :  20:45:08   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send H. Humbert a Private Message
Browsing the articles, I found this exchange and cried laughing.

"What kind of church is this, anyway?"

"We're Mormons," replied Shemidiah.

"Mormons!" she exclaimed. "I thought all of you were killed in Waco."


"A man is his own easiest dupe, for what he wishes to be true he generally believes to be true." --Demosthenes

"The first principle is that you must not fool yourself - and you are the easiest person to fool." --Richard P. Feynman

"Face facts with dignity." --found inside a fortune cookie
Edited by - H. Humbert on 11/13/2004 00:37:18
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Dave W.
Info Junkie

USA
26020 Posts

Posted - 11/12/2004 :  22:01:23   [Permalink]  Show Profile  Visit Dave W.'s Homepage Send Dave W. a Private Message
The letter filthy quoted said:
quote:
...you arent catholic...
Obviously written by a person who can't even be bothered to read the second word of the title of the Web site she's bitching about. That's both clueless and ridiculous. Cream of the pathetic crop, is my vote.

- Dave W. (Private Msg, EMail)
Evidently, I rock!
Why not question something for a change?
Visit Dave's Psoriasis Info, too.
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beskeptigal
SFN Die Hard

USA
3834 Posts

Posted - 11/14/2004 :  23:52:12   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send beskeptigal a Private Message
Maybe they have a hard time figuring out it's satire because it so closely mimics the real thing?
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filthy
SFN Die Hard

USA
14408 Posts

Posted - 11/15/2004 :  06:37:46   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send filthy a Private Message
quote:
Originally posted by beskeptigal

Maybe they have a hard time figuring out it's satire because it so closely mimics the real thing?

'Zackly right. That was the first thing I thought when I found Landover and it's mailbag, lo these many years ago.

It was even better then. You could satiritically (is that a word?) surf the web with that prolific producer of pickled watermelon rinds, Mrs. Judy O'Christian, and use the guest book as a sort of back-handed forum in spite of a stern admonition that it was not a "message board for demons!" We demons chatted merrily away, anyway, as demons are wont to do.

There have been some serious attempts to shut Landover down, but little has come of them. One anti-Landover site is, or was -- I haven't been keeping track, run by the guy who started Landover Baptist.

You'd think that they'd see the spoof. Hell, it's right there in the add for the Jesus anal floss (hehe, I like that one). It shows just how serious tunnel vision can be.

There are few things more amusing than a highly pissed fundementalist (enter delusion of choice). It's especally funny when said fundie is highly pissed over nothing. They fire back, often all in caps and with gross mispelling, not to mention highly creative grammar, like a cannon over-charged with out-of-date powder -- you never know where the shot will end up.

I have played with the thought of sending them a rant myself, a goof on the spoof, so to speak. But if I can think of it, that begs the question how many of the truly outrageous messages actually are goofs.




"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)

"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres


"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude

Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,

and Crypto-Communist!

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Plyss
Skeptic Friend

Netherlands
231 Posts

Posted - 11/15/2004 :  08:38:31   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send Plyss a Private Message
quote:
Originally posted by filthy
I have played with the thought of sending them a rant myself, a goof on the spoof, so to speak. But if I can think of it, that begs the question how many of the truly outrageous messages actually are goofs.



Apparantly i'm less cynical than you are, as my guess would be that most of these are spoofs. Then again, maybe it's just that i'm younger than you

Miss Tick sniffed. 'You could say this piece of advice is pricesless', she said. 'Are you listening?'
'Yes' said Tiffany.
'Good now...If you trust in yourself.."
'Yes..?'
'..and believe in your dreams...'
'yes?'
'...and follow your star..' Miss Tick went on.
'Yes?'
'You'll still get beaten by people who spent their time working hard and learning things and weren't so lazy. Goodbye.'
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filthy
SFN Die Hard

USA
14408 Posts

Posted - 11/15/2004 :  10:01:01   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send filthy a Private Message
quote:
Originally posted by Plyss

quote:
Originally posted by filthy
I have played with the thought of sending them a rant myself, a goof on the spoof, so to speak. But if I can think of it, that begs the question how many of the truly outrageous messages actually are goofs.



Apparantly i'm less cynical than you are, as my guess would be that most of these are spoofs. Then again, maybe it's just that i'm younger than you


Don't know. The best I could is guess, which isn't worth much.

I get a ring of sincerity from many of the messages, bullshit from others.

Which is at least partially why, thus far, I have yet to send them a rant (I can come up with some good ones). But perhaps I will, if I get into just the right frame of mind. If nothing else, they are entertaining and it is good to make people chuckle.

I'd say that you, while perhaps not as cynical as I, are pretty, damned skeptical.


"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)

"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres


"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude

Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,

and Crypto-Communist!

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