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| WendySFN Regular
 
  
USA614 Posts
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|  Posted - 12/20/2004 :  19:05:46       
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           	| Gorgo just inspired me over in Siberia's thread about her upcoming surgery.  The question "Does your home have some unsightly fat?" gave me an idea.  I want to invent a vacuum for home use that sucks out fat, say through a valve in the navel.  Then, say once a month, the fat is collected as part of a lypo-donor program.  You know, to plump out some chick's lips, or round out a flat ass.  Donor and recipient share the cost. Wouldn't that be great?!  
 How 'bout it, everybody.  What would you invent if you had the time and money?  The more outlandish, the better.
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| Millions long for immortality who don't know what to do on a rainy afternoon.
 -- Susan Ertz
 
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| Edited by - Wendy on 12/20/2004  19:25:11
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| H. HumbertSFN Die Hard
 
  
USA4574 Posts
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|  Posted - 12/20/2004 :  19:16:53   [Permalink]     
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| The "Port-O-Bidet." 
 
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| "A man is his own easiest dupe, for what he wishes to be true he generally believes to be true." --Demosthenes
 
 "The first principle is that you must not fool yourself - and you are the easiest person to fool." --Richard P. Feynman
 
 "Face facts with dignity." --found inside a fortune cookie
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| Dave W.Info Junkie
 
  
USA26034 Posts
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|  Posted - 12/20/2004 :  19:35:12   [Permalink]       
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| Wendy, the fat your vacuum sucks out should simply be burned to heat the home, or made into candles on the spot.  Even if the lip-injections find a market, there will still be a vast surplus of fat, anyway. 
 But as to your question, the answer would have to be... TiVo for the brain.  Just think about it: no more searching for note paper.  Plus, you could pause, rewind and slo-mo live life.
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| - Dave W. (Private Msg, EMail)
 Evidently, I rock!
 Why not question something for a change?
 Visit Dave's Psoriasis Info, too.
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| filthySFN Die Hard
 
  
USA14408 Posts
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|  Posted - 12/20/2004 :  19:44:38   [Permalink]     
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| quote:How disgusting!Originally posted by Wendy
 
 Gorgo just inspired me over in Siberia's thread about her upcoming surgery.  The question "Does your home have some unsightly fat?" gave me an idea.  I want to invent a vacuum for home use that sucks out fat, say through a valve in the navel.  Then, say once a month, the fat is collected as part of a lypo-donor program.  You know, to plump out some chick's lips, or round out a flat ass.  Donor and recipient share the cost. Wouldn't that be great?!
  
 How 'bout it, everybody.  What would you invent if you had the time and money?  The more outlandish, the better.
 
 
 
 Keep that up and I'll walk you through a hog-butchering, step by step, including making boudin noir from the blood and large intestine!
 
 I would like to invent a method of giving polititions a temporary but advanced case of tetnus every time they are caught in a lie.
 
 
  
 [6]
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| "What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)
 
 "If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres
 
 
 "The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude
 
 Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,
 
 and Crypto-Communist!
   
 
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| RickySFN Die Hard
 
  
USA4907 Posts
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| WendySFN Regular
 
  
USA614 Posts
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|  Posted - 12/21/2004 :  06:04:10   [Permalink]       
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| quote:Originally posted by Dave W.
 
 Wendy, the fat your vacuum sucks out should simply be burned to heat the home, or made into candles on the spot.  Even if the lip-injections find a market, there will still be a vast surplus of fat, anyway.
 
 Brilliant, Dave!  Lower utility bills for me, and a craft for the kids, too.
 
 quote:Originally posted by filthy
 
 Keep that up and I'll walk you through a hog-butchering, step by step, including making boudin noir from the blood and large intestine!
 
 Yikes! I promise to be good from now on!!
  
 quote:Originally posted by Ricky
 
 In a related story, I was just run completely off the road (literally on the grass) today by some asshole
 
 That happened to me about a year ago.  Pissed me off, then scared the hell out of me.  Glad you're okay.
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| Millions long for immortality who don't know what to do on a rainy afternoon.
 -- Susan Ertz
 
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| filthySFN Die Hard
 
  
USA14408 Posts
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|  Posted - 12/21/2004 :  08:07:16   [Permalink]     
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| I think that I should like to invent a gadget, cheap to build; easy to use, that would turn lead into gold detect counterfit bills of any denomation of any currencyturn lead into gold.
 
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| "What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)
 
 "If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres
 
 
 "The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude
 
 Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,
 
 and Crypto-Communist!
   
 
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| astropinSFN Regular
 
  
USA970 Posts
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|  Posted - 12/21/2004 :  10:50:47   [Permalink]     
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| I'm just waiting for Drexler's Nonobots and hoping they don't destroy us, but work as planned. That would take care of eveyone elses inventions as well. |  
| I would rather face a cold reality than delude myself with comforting fantasies.
 
 You are free to believe what you want to believe and I am free to ridicule you for it.
 
 Atheism:
 The result of an unbiased and rational search for the truth.
 
 Infinitus est numerus stultorum
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| tw101356Skeptic Friend
 
  
USA333 Posts
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|  Posted - 12/21/2004 :  12:42:05   [Permalink]     
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| Remote control batteries for use in childrens' toys, especially the loud ones given to the kid by relatives who don't live in the same house. 
 
 quote:
 BOOM...Boom...boom...boo....bo...b..b..b.....
 
 "Oh Dear.  Looks like the batteries in your eXtreme Junior Seismologist Earthquake Simulator are dead again.  Daddy will get more when he gets the paper in the morning.  How about a nice story and some warm milk?"
 
 
 
 Sell the remotes for $2 and make the money off the batteries.
 
 - TW
 
 
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| - TW
 
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| WendySFN Regular
 
  
USA614 Posts
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|  Posted - 12/21/2004 :  13:36:30   [Permalink]       
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| quote:Originally posted by tw101356
 
 Remote control batteries for use in childrens' toys, especially the loud ones given to the kid by relatives who don't live in the same house.
 
 
 Please put me down for three.
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| Millions long for immortality who don't know what to do on a rainy afternoon.
 -- Susan Ertz
 
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| Valiant DancerForum Goalie
 
  
USA4826 Posts
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|  Posted - 12/21/2004 :  13:55:05   [Permalink]       
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| quote:Originally posted by H. Humbert
 
 The "Port-O-Bidet."
 
 
 
 
 
 There's just something oddly wrong about that concept.
 
 Point to point teleporter? (Gee, I gotta go to the store for eggs. <tweedle>)
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| Cthulhu/Asmodeus when you're tired of voting for the lesser of two evils
 
 Brother Cutlass of Reasoned Discussion
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| filthySFN Die Hard
 
  
USA14408 Posts
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|  Posted - 12/21/2004 :  13:58:49   [Permalink]     
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| How 'bout an unbreakable bullshit detector? Since Bush took office, mine keeps overloading. 
 
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| "What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)
 
 "If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres
 
 
 "The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude
 
 Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,
 
 and Crypto-Communist!
   
 
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| Mr. SpockSkeptic Friend
 
  
USA99 Posts
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|  Posted - 12/21/2004 :  14:12:59   [Permalink]     
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| Speaking of remote control devices, how about a remote that produces a horrible screeching noise (imagine that noise you get when you accidentally dial a fax, only 100x louder)in the ears of cell phone users?  (Actually I'm being nice--I had originally concieved of something that would cause these nuisances to explosively self-destruct, but even I am not that mean!) |  
| "The amount of noise which anyone can bear stands in inverse proportion to his mental capacity."  --Schopenhauer
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| RickySFN Die Hard
 
  
USA4907 Posts
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| tomk80SFN Regular
 
  
Netherlands1278 Posts
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|  Posted - 12/21/2004 :  17:14:53   [Permalink]       
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| I would invent a device to give creationists a sense of logic. Might come in handy for politicians also. |  
| Tom
 
 `Contrariwise,' continued Tweedledee, `if it was so, it might be; and if it were so, it would be; but as it isn't, it ain't. That's logic.'
 -Through the Looking Glass by Lewis Caroll-
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| RickySFN Die Hard
 
  
USA4907 Posts
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