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 "2012": Woo, woo, W0o7!
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HalfMooner
Dingaling

Philippines
15831 Posts

Posted - 11/15/2009 :  21:51:10  Show Profile Send HalfMooner a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Mt daughter and her partner just took me out to see the end-of-the-world movie, "2012."

If you don't much like to read, here's my reaction in a nutshell:

The screenwriters owe the production company many times whatever they were paid. The science advisors... well there just couldn't have been any science advisors. Any critical thinker will be repeatedly offended by the plot. But if you love to see what the state of the special effects art is today -- just go, shut off your brain, and watch the eye candy.

The plot revolves around this idea: As foreseen by the ancient Mayans, several other religions, and ("sort of") the Bible, neutrinos from the sun suddenly and inexplicably have stopped passing through the earth with little interaction. Following a huge solar flare, neutrinos begin microwaving the earth's interior to a broil.

Plate tectonics is replaced with some kind of Plate Air Hockey, where continental plates move up and down at random, or laterally at better than the speed of sound. The screenplay kisses every woo arse imaginable. It's simply a horrible screenplay that should have been burned or had a stake driven through its heart when it was spawned.

But the digital special effects are absolutely remarkable. In other words, Director Roland Emmerich's "2012" is kind of like the original (and the remainder of) Star Wars.


Emmerich threw in a few slow, boring scenes like this just
so the audience would know it was safe to visit the snack bar.

2012 relies almost entirely on one insane cliffhanger scene after another. Instead of chase scenes with good guys and bad guys, we see cracks in the earth chasing the protagonists, lava bombs smashing into their vehicles, glowing pyroclastic clouds following them. The plot is merely an excuse for the special effects. It's mindless George Lucas style non-stop action.

My favorite scene is of the Pope and his cardinals huddled in the Sistine Chapel, looking up as a crack runs across the ceiling, neatly opening a gap between Michaelangelo's Adam and God.

There seems to be a version of Moore's Law at work on special effects. If you haven't seen a big-budget SFX movie lately, see 2012 just to catch up on what's now possible. 2012 is as amazing to the eye as it is offensive to the brain.

But first switch your brain from "Think" to "Record." And even then (like Star Wars), expect to have a kind of buyer's remorse a few years later, when you shudder to think you'd actually enjoyed this travesty when it was released.

Biology is just physics that has begun to smell bad.” —HalfMooner
Here's a link to Moonscape News, and one to its Archive.

Edited by - HalfMooner on 11/15/2009 22:10:17

H. Humbert
SFN Die Hard

USA
4574 Posts

Posted - 11/15/2009 :  22:29:51   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send H. Humbert a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Originally posted by HalfMooner
My favorite scene is of the Pope and his cardinals huddled in the Sistine Chapel, looking up as a crack runs across the ceiling, neatly opening a gap between Michaelangelo's Adam and God.
Speaking of the film's blatant disregard for facts, here's what Roger Ebert said about that scene:
When St. Peter's Basilica is destroyed, Leonardo's God and Adam are split apart just where their fingers touch (the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel having been moved into St. Peter's for the occasion).


Alas, Ebert misspoke. The Sistine Chapel wasn't Da Vinci's work, but Michelangelo's.


"A man is his own easiest dupe, for what he wishes to be true he generally believes to be true." --Demosthenes

"The first principle is that you must not fool yourself - and you are the easiest person to fool." --Richard P. Feynman

"Face facts with dignity." --found inside a fortune cookie
Edited by - H. Humbert on 11/15/2009 22:33:25
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Dude
SFN Die Hard

USA
6891 Posts

Posted - 11/15/2009 :  22:34:59   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send Dude a Private Message  Reply with Quote
I'm a movie fan, but I'm not giving these guys my money. I'm pretty sick of the 2012 nonsense and every review of this movie has been about what 'mooner has said. Visually appealing but fucking retarded.

I'll go see James Cameron's alien smurf movie though.


Ignorance is preferable to error; and he is less remote from the truth who believes nothing, than he who believes what is wrong.
-- Thomas Jefferson

"god :: the last refuge of a man with no answers and no argument." - G. Carlin

Hope, n.
The handmaiden of desperation; the opiate of despair; the illegible signpost on the road to perdition. ~~ da filth
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Dave W.
Info Junkie

USA
25977 Posts

Posted - 11/15/2009 :  22:39:03   [Permalink]  Show Profile  Visit Dave W.'s Homepage Send Dave W. a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Peter Suderman has coined the terms "catastrophaganza" and "retardiculous" to describe the film.

Hat tip to Razib Khan, who also quotes an NY Times piece that says at $65 million, 2012 is the highest-opening original movie (not a sequel) ever.

- Dave W. (Private Msg, EMail)
Evidently, I rock!
Why not question something for a change?
Visit Dave's Psoriasis Info, too.
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Kil
Evil Skeptic

USA
13459 Posts

Posted - 11/16/2009 :  01:12:20   [Permalink]  Show Profile  Visit Kil's Homepage  Send Kil an AOL message  Send Kil a Yahoo! Message Send Kil a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Dude:
I'll go see James Cameron's alien smurf movie though.

Couldn't be worse than "Titanic."

Uncertainty may make you uncomfortable. Certainty makes you ridiculous.

Why not question something for a change?

Genetic Literacy Project
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Dr. Mabuse
Septic Fiend

Sweden
9668 Posts

Posted - 11/16/2009 :  03:09:47   [Permalink]  Show Profile  Send Dr. Mabuse an ICQ Message Send Dr. Mabuse a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Originally posted by Dude
I'll go see James Cameron's alien smurf movie though.

I must have a temporary brain-lapse or something, because I don't get this reference.

Dr. Mabuse - "When the going gets tough, the tough get Duct-tape..."
Dr. Mabuse whisper.mp3

"Equivocation is not just a job, for a creationist it's a way of life..." Dr. Mabuse

Support American Troops in Iraq:
Send them unarmed civilians for target practice..
Collateralmurder.
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HalfMooner
Dingaling

Philippines
15831 Posts

Posted - 11/16/2009 :  03:51:35   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send HalfMooner a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Originally posted by Dude

I'm a movie fan, but I'm not giving these guys my money. I'm pretty sick of the 2012 nonsense and every review of this movie has been about what 'mooner has said. Visually appealing but fucking retarded.

I'll go see James Cameron's alien smurf movie though.


This was basically what I began telling my daughter. But she and her partner were determined to go, and had already bought tickets, including mine. So I switched to the old, "thank you much, I'll come," argument.

One good thing about 2012 is that the woo-woo is not presented intelligibly or seriously. Another is that this movie will be largely forgotten as the year 2012 approaches. 2012 exploits, far more than promotes, this latest doomsday nonsense.

Biology is just physics that has begun to smell bad.” —HalfMooner
Here's a link to Moonscape News, and one to its Archive.
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filthy
SFN Die Hard

USA
14408 Posts

Posted - 11/16/2009 :  04:36:40   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send filthy a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Originally posted by Kil

Dude:
I'll go see James Cameron's alien smurf movie though.

Couldn't be worse than "Titanic."
Didn't see Titanic and feel no loss. I doubt if I'll see this turkey either, and still feel comfortable in the lack of it.

I dunno, but for some reason overdone special effects don't do much for me. Another flaw in my character, I suppose.

Um, an alien smurf movie sounds like it might have potential.....




"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)

"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres


"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude

Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,

and Crypto-Communist!

Edited by - filthy on 11/16/2009 04:38:55
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Dude
SFN Die Hard

USA
6891 Posts

Posted - 11/16/2009 :  09:08:29   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send Dude a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Originally posted by Dr. Mabuse

Originally posted by Dude
I'll go see James Cameron's alien smurf movie though.

I must have a temporary brain-lapse or something, because I don't get this reference.



Alien smurfs.


Ignorance is preferable to error; and he is less remote from the truth who believes nothing, than he who believes what is wrong.
-- Thomas Jefferson

"god :: the last refuge of a man with no answers and no argument." - G. Carlin

Hope, n.
The handmaiden of desperation; the opiate of despair; the illegible signpost on the road to perdition. ~~ da filth
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Dr. Mabuse
Septic Fiend

Sweden
9668 Posts

Posted - 11/16/2009 :  09:13:33   [Permalink]  Show Profile  Send Dr. Mabuse an ICQ Message Send Dr. Mabuse a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Originally posted by Dude

Originally posted by Dr. Mabuse

Originally posted by Dude
I'll go see James Cameron's alien smurf movie though.

I must have a temporary brain-lapse or something, because I don't get this reference.



Alien smurfs.


Ah.. That one. I plan on watching that one. And probably 2012 too.

Dr. Mabuse - "When the going gets tough, the tough get Duct-tape..."
Dr. Mabuse whisper.mp3

"Equivocation is not just a job, for a creationist it's a way of life..." Dr. Mabuse

Support American Troops in Iraq:
Send them unarmed civilians for target practice..
Collateralmurder.
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HalfMooner
Dingaling

Philippines
15831 Posts

Posted - 11/16/2009 :  09:46:30   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send HalfMooner a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Originally posted by Dude

Originally posted by Dr. Mabuse

Originally posted by Dude
I'll go see James Cameron's alien smurf movie though.

I must have a temporary brain-lapse or something, because I don't get this reference.



Alien smurfs.


Thanks! I would rather have seen Avatar!

Biology is just physics that has begun to smell bad.” —HalfMooner
Here's a link to Moonscape News, and one to its Archive.
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astropin
SFN Regular

USA
970 Posts

Posted - 11/16/2009 :  10:20:06   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send astropin a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Wow.....ripping on Star Wars, ripping on Titanic....you guys are harsh.

I would rather face a cold reality than delude myself with comforting fantasies.

You are free to believe what you want to believe and I am free to ridicule you for it.

Atheism:
The result of an unbiased and rational search for the truth.

Infinitus est numerus stultorum
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Dr. Mabuse
Septic Fiend

Sweden
9668 Posts

Posted - 11/16/2009 :  11:53:36   [Permalink]  Show Profile  Send Dr. Mabuse an ICQ Message Send Dr. Mabuse a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Star Wars was uncalled for, but Titanic sank just like the original boat. The only redeeming aspect of Titanic was... eh... I don't remember.

Dr. Mabuse - "When the going gets tough, the tough get Duct-tape..."
Dr. Mabuse whisper.mp3

"Equivocation is not just a job, for a creationist it's a way of life..." Dr. Mabuse

Support American Troops in Iraq:
Send them unarmed civilians for target practice..
Collateralmurder.
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Dude
SFN Die Hard

USA
6891 Posts

Posted - 11/16/2009 :  11:59:05   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send Dude a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Hey, I am a fan of SW! Sure, the movies have been kinda crappy... bbut the thing has spawned it's own highly detailed mythos! Some very good writers have taken up the story/plot chores and made the whole thing interesting.

We need Lucas to make a SW trilogy out of the Thrawn books!

But Lucas probably can't actually direct a movie that involves inticate plots and requires convincing acting.


Ignorance is preferable to error; and he is less remote from the truth who believes nothing, than he who believes what is wrong.
-- Thomas Jefferson

"god :: the last refuge of a man with no answers and no argument." - G. Carlin

Hope, n.
The handmaiden of desperation; the opiate of despair; the illegible signpost on the road to perdition. ~~ da filth
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H. Humbert
SFN Die Hard

USA
4574 Posts

Posted - 11/16/2009 :  12:02:25   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send H. Humbert a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Originally posted by Dr. Mabuse
The only redeeming aspect of Titanic was... eh... I don't remember.
You don't remember Kate Winslet's breasts?


"A man is his own easiest dupe, for what he wishes to be true he generally believes to be true." --Demosthenes

"The first principle is that you must not fool yourself - and you are the easiest person to fool." --Richard P. Feynman

"Face facts with dignity." --found inside a fortune cookie
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Hawks
SFN Regular

Canada
1383 Posts

Posted - 11/16/2009 :  16:44:26   [Permalink]  Show Profile  Visit Hawks's Homepage Send Hawks a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Well, I'll be quite keen to watch The Expendables when it hits the big screen. I have no idea what it's about, but it's cast include

Sylvester Stallone
Arnold Schwarzenegger
Bruce Willis
Dolph Lundgren (go, Sweden)
Jet Li
Jason Statham
Mickey Rourke
Danny Trejo
Eric Roberts

METHINKS IT IS LIKE A WEASEL
It's a small, off-duty czechoslovakian traffic warden!
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