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Dave W.
Info Junkie
USA
26021 Posts |
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bngbuck
SFN Addict
USA
2437 Posts |
Posted - 07/25/2008 : 00:37:23 [Permalink]
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Dave and Chaloobi.....
Thanks for the product information. This was particularly useful | They're made in ovens, using flour and water. |
I found thirteen varieties at Catholic Supply of Saint Louis, and I avoided even the suggestion of a microwaved product! (Made me think of that damn cat story!)
I ended up with the cheapest:1-1/8" White
Box of 1000 (Item #57212) $11.40
10+ Boxes Only $10.45 each. |
I thought a thousand would probably do for a start! They're on the way!
Now, do either of you founts of Catholic information happen to know of a priest for hire? I hate to use a want ad in the National Catholic Register because of the need for anonymity. My balls are nowhere near the size of CZ's!
When I say for hire, I mean payment in money; I can't arrange for child abuse or anything like that.
Also, do either of you know if transubstantiation is doable on a volume basis (all 1000 with one incantation), or am I going to have to pay the Father by the hour? I will if I have to, but I'd like to do this as cheaply as possible. After all, it is a cheap trick!
Thanks again, and I don't know what I'd do without you guys!
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filthy
SFN Die Hard
USA
14408 Posts |
 Posted - 07/25/2008 : 03:50:39 [Permalink]
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Oh hell buck, just claim the crackers gots the juju. No one's gonna prove otherwise, and anyone who'll believe without reservation the tripe the Church spews will believe you if you tell it just right.
But then again: "The Pope, she's'a do anything for the money!" ~~ Captain Bertarelli, 'allo 'allo
I'm sure a priest can be bought, but why the needlesss expense? Just lie; they do it all the time.
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"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)
"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres
"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude
Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,
and Crypto-Communist! 
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| Edited by - filthy on 07/25/2008 03:56:06 |
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Dave W.
Info Junkie
USA
26021 Posts |
 Posted - 07/25/2008 : 08:31:58 [Permalink]
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Originally posted by bngbuck
Thanks for the product information. This was particularly useful | They're made in ovens, using flour and water. |
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I was sure that that was going to be a highlight for you.I thought a thousand would probably do for a start! They're on the way!
Now, do either of you founts of Catholic information happen to know of a priest for hire? I hate to use a want ad in the National Catholic Register because of the need for anonymity. My balls are nowhere near the size of CZ's! |
I've heard it said that once you're made a priest, you keep your juju no matter what, even if you're excommunicated. So I bet all you need to do is find a disgrunted ex-priest, and you'll be all set, perhaps for free.
Me, I was going to order a thousand of 'em to use in an art project, but it just seems all derivative now. |
- Dave W. (Private Msg, EMail)
Evidently, I rock!
Why not question something for a change?
Visit Dave's Psoriasis Info, too. |
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bngbuck
SFN Addict
USA
2437 Posts |
Posted - 07/25/2008 : 08:42:17 [Permalink]
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Filthy.....
My God, Filth, you want me to LIE about the religion of the Priests and the Bishops? That's a Cardinal sin!"The penalty of anathema shall be imposed on anyone who 'denieth, that, in the sacrament of the most holy Eucharist, are contained truly, really, and substantially, the body and blood together with the soul and divinity of our Lord Jesus Christ, and consequently the whole Christ; but saith that He is only therein as in a sign, or in figure, or virtue' and anyone who 'saith, that, in the sacred and holy sacrament of the Eucharist, the substance of the bread and wine remains conjointly with the body and blood of our Lord Jesus Christ, and denieth that wonderful and singular conversion of the whole substance of the bread into the Body, and of the whole substance of the wine into the Blood - the species only of the bread and wine remaining - which conversion indeed the Catholic Church most aptly calls Transubstantiation'".
From the Coucil of Trent |
Jumpin' Jesus Christ - ANATHEMA, yet!!!
Fuck, I thought just ordinary enemas were pretty bad!
And besides, my extraordinarily high code of personal ethics does not permit me to justify doing something terrible like lying, just because Catholic priests do it! Why, if I started down that path, I might find myself becoming unnaturally attracted to little boys....
I would never do that!
Now, teenage girls are a different matter....
I do wonder why PZ felt so strongly that the damn matzo melba toast had to be consecrated before he could desecrate it. Surely those idiotic rituals don't mean any more to him than they do to you or me!
Why didn't he just lie about it?
Come to think of it, he didn't offer any proof that the fucking wonder wafer pictured in the garbage can had been metousiosisied by some pedophile chokecollar! He just implied that it had been supplied to him by a catholic cracker thief.
I THINK PZ LIED! He bought his cookie from the Catholic Crap store in St. Louis!
And if so, good for him! This overstarched world not only needs more iconoclasts, it needs some good, basic LYING iconoclasts who don't give a shit for the truth any more than Baron Munchausen or your standard drugstore politicial hack like Soporific John, the droning antique who can lie you to sleep in thirty seconds flat. John, by the way, is an Episcopalian, which is a kind of jack Anglican, which itself is arguably jack-off Catholicism!
I haven't yet completed the plan for the 1000 wafers. I'm thinking of possibly barbecuing them, transubstantiating the fuckers into really good spare ribs (Christ, those ribs were good!); or maybe with pepperoni, sausage and cheese we'll have Jesus Pizzas! I also see possibilities for a restaurant chain here - Ruth's Christ Steak Houses, coast to coast!
I'm still waiting to hear from Dave and Chaloobi.
I'm afraid they're not taking me seriously! |
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filthy
SFN Die Hard
USA
14408 Posts |
Posted - 07/25/2008 : 09:33:47 [Permalink]
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PZ sort'a fell into it after protesting, in approprate terms, the shabby treatment Mr. Cook recieved at the hands of the oh-so-forgiving Catholics.
And, in the other thread (10 pages! That's the longest any of my OPs have run!), I've posted the video (from Pharyngula) that shows the cracker in question being Churchified. But no matter, your lie will be as a gnat's flatulence compared to those of Christianity, past & current. Just write it off to casual treachery, less than a mere bagatell in the history of religion, and so common as to escape notice.
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"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)
"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres
"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude
Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,
and Crypto-Communist!
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Dave W.
Info Junkie
USA
26021 Posts |
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Kil
Evil Skeptic
USA
13476 Posts |
Posted - 07/25/2008 : 11:10:27 [Permalink]
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Well, it may be too soon to tell, but it looks like my prediction of a damaging backlash was not correct. That's a good thing.
I still have the same opinion as to the wisdom of this kind of protest, for reasons that run much deeper than how the media might report it and how a wider swath of moderate Christians might take it.
Anyhow, there you go...
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Uncertainty may make you uncomfortable. Certainty makes you ridiculous.
Why not question something for a change?
Genetic Literacy Project |
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filthy
SFN Die Hard
USA
14408 Posts |
Posted - 07/25/2008 : 11:42:50 [Permalink]
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Originally posted by Kil
Well, it may be too soon to tell, but it looks like my prediction of a damaging backlash was not correct. That's a good thing.
I still have the same opinion as to the wisdom of this kind of protest, for reasons that run much deeper than how the media might report it and how a wider swath of moderate Christians might take it.
Anyhow, there you go...
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This is a one-shot deal. It is all the rage, the sound & the fury in our little corner, but I'd bet that the great bulk of folks, Catholic & otherwise, haven't the faintest idea that it's happened at all. And of those who do, most have other matters more pressing and couldn't care less.
While Host-molesting might continue to happen, here & there, it will never become epidemic simply because, really, in the final analysis, it's nothing but a stupid, fucking cracker and not worthy of a whole hell of a lot of effort, the voo-doo surrounding it not withstanding.
But it was a lot of fun -- some blood pressures got a healthy jacking up -- now it is about time to go on to some other, silly outrage. My only regret in the whole affair is that I was unable to start a fight in here. 
Whassamatta, you Catholics out there? Why you don't show some spirit!
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"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)
"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres
"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude
Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,
and Crypto-Communist!
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| Edited by - filthy on 07/25/2008 11:44:39 |
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Dave W.
Info Junkie
USA
26021 Posts |
Posted - 07/25/2008 : 19:06:20 [Permalink]
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Originally posted by Kil
Well, it may be too soon to tell, but it looks like my prediction of a damaging backlash was not correct. That's a good thing.
I still have the same opinion as to the wisdom of this kind of protest, for reasons that run much deeper than how the media might report it and how a wider swath of moderate Christians might take it. |
Actually, it looks like there may be a backlash brewing, just not the direction you were thinking. As in Taz's comment 64, "...lay off the prof. or the cracker gets it." That, followed up by Sastra's comment 79, relating the story of flag-burning amendment protest threats. And then watercat's comment 87 is a vow to commit sacrilege, as well.
The more Bill Donohue and his ilk call for PZ's censure, the more likely it will be that more wafer desecration will occur.
(Funny, Max Verret at comment 12 thinks that a Lutheran is going to rush to the defense of a Catholic.)
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- Dave W. (Private Msg, EMail)
Evidently, I rock!
Why not question something for a change?
Visit Dave's Psoriasis Info, too. |
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Dr. Mabuse
Septic Fiend
Sweden
9687 Posts |
Posted - 07/26/2008 : 01:55:21 [Permalink]
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Originally posted by bngbuck
Come to think of it, he didn't offer any proof that the fucking wonder wafer pictured in the garbage can had been metousiosisied by some pedophile chokecollar! He just implied that it had been supplied to him by a catholic cracker thief.
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That's why I'd LOVE to see a video of someone getting the blessed cracker, running out of the church and feeding it to a dog. It would provide an un-broken chain of evidence...  |
Dr. Mabuse - "When the going gets tough, the tough get Duct-tape..."
Dr. Mabuse whisper.mp3
"Equivocation is not just a job, for a creationist it's a way of life..." Dr. Mabuse
Support American Troops in Iraq:
Send them unarmed civilians for target practice..
Collateralmurder. |
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filthy
SFN Die Hard
USA
14408 Posts |
Posted - 07/26/2008 : 03:28:39 [Permalink]
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How best to desecrate a sacred cracker? I dunno, but the symbolism should be solid and it should be kept as simple as possible -- PZ did an excellent job of that. Perhaps eat it with a bit of potted meat on Friday? Oh, wait, that won't work ever since some pope or other tossed the mackerel-snapping rule.
I dunno. Maybe just ignoring the whole, silly cracker thingy along with not coughing up for the collection plate, and refusing to pay any tithes would get it done. The Bible tells us that God would have an almighty hissy-fit if a goodly percentage of everybody's stuff was not forthcoming, PDQ. Exactly what God did/does with the stuff remains unclear. I suspect that he consigns it to his priests in proportion to their rank in the Church's hierarchy so that they can please him, thereby saving their 'flocks' the bother beyond coming up with yet more stuff. PDQ.
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"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)
"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres
"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude
Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,
and Crypto-Communist!
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Dr. Mabuse
Septic Fiend
Sweden
9687 Posts |
Posted - 07/26/2008 : 15:13:56 [Permalink]
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Originally posted by filthy
How best to desecrate a sacred cracker? I dunno, but the symbolism should be solid and it should be kept as simple as possible -- PZ did an excellent job of that. Perhaps eat it with a bit of potted meat on Friday? Oh, wait, that won't work ever since some pope or other tossed the mackerel-snapping rule. |
Considering that Jesus was a jew, try mixing it with something un-kosher. Serve it with shrimp cheese, or clams. Then feed it to your favourite pet of choice.
The point being, your pet won't follow you to heaven according to doctrin.
(That cheese-spread tube I linked to is common in Sweden. I love it. They also have blue cheese. I love that even more...  )
Edited: Grammar and such. |
Dr. Mabuse - "When the going gets tough, the tough get Duct-tape..."
Dr. Mabuse whisper.mp3
"Equivocation is not just a job, for a creationist it's a way of life..." Dr. Mabuse
Support American Troops in Iraq:
Send them unarmed civilians for target practice..
Collateralmurder. |
| Edited by - Dr. Mabuse on 07/27/2008 04:32:17 |
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Dave W.
Info Junkie
USA
26021 Posts |
Posted - 08/08/2008 : 22:08:39 [Permalink]
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Okay, the master framer is at it again, making ridiculous hay out of PZ and basically faulting him for not being nice. (I especially like the part where Nisbet suggests that being "incredulous" is a negative thing.) Being "the nice atheist" seems to be of utmost importance to Nisbet (not nice to mean atheists, of course), but commenters on PZ's blog have been describing just how far being "the nice atheist" gets a person.
gillt says,I've been debating these "librul" christians all week over on a religious website which spewed some bigotry on how atheists can't have a morality. I'm concise; they call me intolerant; I'm plain-spoken, they call me rude; I'm assertive, they call me insensitive; I know more science than they do, they call me ignorant. I want to thank you Matt Nisbet from the bottom of my cold, black, heathen heart for giving the religious the impression that it is okay slander atheists because we're all too timid to respond to blatant ignorance and hardened intolerance. JWright agrees:Oh I had the same problem today on Facebook. A friend of a friend posted a note about how "all atheists are hypocrites" and then proceeded to present weak, flawed arguments that he must have encountered from a weak atheist (or just made up himself), ie, "If there's a god he should show us miracles, but he doesn't so he doesn't exist."
Terrible argument.
So I came in a blew the discussion out of the water with several different, coherent arguments, in a completely polite, civilized manner, and they call me intolerant, bigoted, and ignorant. Projection much? It finally came down to them saying I believed in electrons even though I had never seen one, so I linked them to This Article, and then they deleted all of my comments and pretended it never happened.
And WE'RE the hypocrites? craig has mad sarcasm skillz:Though I guess I have to admit Nesbit is right... look at the example of the right-wing in this country, for example.
For at least a generation, the right wing has gone to extremes in behaviour and rhetoric, spewing hatred in books and on TV and all day on the radio. They've labeled anyone who disagrees with them as traitors, they've openly called for the death of public officials who they see as even the slightest bit to the left of them.
The result, of course, was disastrous for them, causing them to become a tiny marginalized minority with no political power, and led directly to the hard swing to the left in the US and its subsequent rejection of militarism, imperialism and capitalism. craig with an anecdote:I've tried Nisbet's strategy before. It doesn't work.
In a PUBLIC school, the subject of god came up, and I mentioned I didn't believe in it. Within moments the classroom was in an uproar with other students standing up and loudly repeating with astonishment the fact that I didn't believe in god.
I politely explained that I just personally saw no evidence for it, that it didn't make sense to me, and that I thought science had a better explanation.
The response I got was to have a red-faced, angry SCIENCE TEACHER berate me and call me a foolish idiot in front of the class.
Yeah, Nisbet's tactic sure worked well there. And Wowbagger asks:Can anyone who was at any point religious tell me - when you were in doubt about the existence of god, did the demeanour and/or the behaviours of atheists have any impact on the decision to give it up? If so, what effect? Positive or negative? ...and Danio answers:100% positive. I was relieved to discover that other people found religion as intractable and preposterous as I did. The 'four horsemen', and PZ made the biggest impression on me, but I must credit DJ Grothe and the Point of Inquiry podcast for introducing me to most of them in interviews, though as an upshot I discovered that I liked their approach more than that of the CFI/'Framing' crew. negentropyeater may have a part of the real solution:What gets me is the bickering.
Shouldn't it be obvious that stimulating a diversity of approaches will benefit atheists more than arguing endlessly that "my approach is best". Atheists can benefit from the PZ approach, the Nisbett approach, the Dennett approach, the more the better.
Just do what you think is best, but stop arguing that what you think is best, is the best. Obviously, there will always be people who will speak out with "my approach is better than your approach," so there needs to be more than just an agreement to lay off such bickering. I'm not sure what that "more" might be.
Oh, and I really want some of that ideological porn that Nisbet mentions, too. Clearly, I've been left off the mailing list.
Edited to add that craig is awesome:...The white people who were not bigots but sat on their asses to avoid confrontation did NOTHING to help blacks gain rights, and in fact were an impediment to it.
Christians who don't hate atheists but who are not willing to fight against their fellow Christians for the rights of atheists are at best irrelevant and at worst enablers. I am not going to waste my time worrying about how they will react... |
- Dave W. (Private Msg, EMail)
Evidently, I rock!
Why not question something for a change?
Visit Dave's Psoriasis Info, too. |
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filthy
SFN Die Hard
USA
14408 Posts |
Posted - 08/09/2008 : 04:56:00 [Permalink]
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Originally posted by Dr. Mabuse
Originally posted by filthy
How best to desecrate a sacred cracker? I dunno, but the symbolism should be solid and it should be kept as simple as possible -- PZ did an excellent job of that. Perhaps eat it with a bit of potted meat on Friday? Oh, wait, that won't work ever since some pope or other tossed the mackerel-snapping rule. |
Considering that Jesus was a jew, try mixing it with something un-kosher. Serve it with shrimp cheese, or clams. Then feed it to your favourite pet of choice.
The point being, your pet won't follow you to heaven according to doctrin.
(That cheese-spread tube I linked to is common in Sweden. I love it. They also have blue cheese. I love that even more... )
Edited: Grammar and such.
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I see that you are not acquainted with our potted meat. It is pure pork with the consistency of canned mud and made from those portions of the hog that, if mentioned by a child at the dinner table, will bring about a parental rebuke. In brief, it is garbage but quite tasty enough to make the cracker palatable, even delicious. Put a shot of Tabasco on it and you'd have a pleasant snack to get you through the trials & travails of Communion.
Dave, "Mr. Nice Atheist" only works if you are in a position of authority or of imposing, physical stature. As I can claim neither, I must go with "Mr. Mean-As-A-Provoked-Snake Atheist," and get pretty much left alone for it as a result. Indeed, over the years, my vile presence has gone from being ignored to accepted in the community and I even get invited to church (Southern Baptist) functions such as charity fish frys and the like. When I donate to charity, I often do it through that church. They are, after all, my neighbors and taken all in, a pretty likable bunch. But it has been a long time since I've been witnessed at.
This whole cracker business has gone way too far. We've all had a lot of fun with it, atheist and theist alike, but now it's reached the sweat & grunt stage of discussion and there is little point in keeping it going. This will not, of course, prevent Donohue, et al., from slobbering on because they think that they have a cause, a mission to fulfill. And they do, but it's the same, tired, old crap of turning the world into a Christian theocracy and getting everybody's stuff for the Church. The cracker crusade (yeesh! I can't believe I wrote that) gives them at least an imaginary leg up toward that goal, but only as long as they can keep it in public view.
On the atheistic side of it, we think that we've drawn blood, and we have, but there are some atheists who want to draw still more and will keep it going for no better reason than to piss Donohue, et al., off, thereby showing how full of shit he/they are as they express lame & worn out outrage. It gives them an imaginary leg up in promoting atheism and at some point, they will begin look as ridiculous as the opposition.
Me, I'm satisfied with the tiny bit of blood I've drawn, am now perfectly content to let the fucker die, and would invite all concerned on either side out for barbecue & beer, if I had the cash for it.
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"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)
"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres
"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude
Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,
and Crypto-Communist!
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The wages of sin
